1) Commissioner's hearing is, in fact, a trial.

"Summary of Domestic Relations Law in Virginia

A road map through a contested divorce case:

The basic suit paper, referred to as the bill of complaint, is filed by the spouse seeking a divorce, and then served on (delivered to) the other spouse. The divorce is then filed.

Within 21 days, the opposing spouse files his or her answer to the suit and possibly also a crossbill (counter suit). (If the counter fill is filed, it must be answered with 21 days.)

If one party is in immediate need of spousal or child support, or a ruling on temporary custody, he or she will typically require the other party to attend a temporary support hearing within approximately one month. Temporary custody can also be decided at that hearing.

Through their lawyers, the parties exchange information on all relevant issues in the case, such as tax returns, banking records, expense sheets, medical records, etc. and any information dealing with custody and visitation. Depositions (questions and answers under oath conducted by the lawyers) can be taken. Depositions are one of the major expense items in a divorce. This process typically takes several months in a contested case. (In uncontested cases, this process is frequently skipped).

Next, there will be a commissioner's hearing, which, in effect, is a trial. The commissioner's hearing is conducted by a commissioner, who is simply a lawyer who has been designated by the court to hear these cases for the judges. The commissioner recommends to the judge how the case should be decided (who gets custody, how much support, etc.) Each party can testify and can expect to be cross-examined. Each party can question witness and introduce documents at the commissioner's hearing as well. In an uncontested case, the commissioner's hearing in a proforma ritual which takes about ten minutes; in a contested case, it is much like real trial and can take days.

The commissioner issues his report to the judge, and the lawyers for both sides get copies.

If either spouse does not like what the commissioner has recommended, that spouse has ten days within which to register his or her objections (exceptions) to the report.

Typically, a few weeks later, the circuit court judge will hear argument on the exceptions to the commissioner's report. At this time, the circuit judge will make final rulings and one of the lawyers will be directed to prepare the final decree of divorce or other order reflecting those rulings.

If the lawyers cannot agree to the wording of the final decree of divorce or other order, there will need to be another hearing over the wording, at which point the judge usually signs the divorce decree.

After the final divorce decree is entered, either party may remarry; however, for a period of thirty days following the entry of the final decree of divorce, either party may appeal. For that reason, it is inadvisable to remarry during the first thirty days. Moreover, a final decree is modifiable by the trial court for a period of twenty-one days following the date of entry of the final decree.

If either side wishes, he or she can appeal the final decree or order to the Virginia Court of Appeals. Such an appeal will normally only involve technical legal issues but still can alter the outcome of the case. An appeal will typically take about a year and will cost $2,500 to $5,000, depending on the complexity. An appeal can end the case, or it can also result in the case being sent back for new proceedings, including possibly a new commissioner's hearing."
http://library.findlaw.com/2000/Jun/1/127630.html

2) The commissioner is a Court apointed layer to hear the cases related to domestic relations, with the duty to issue a report to the judge after the hearing.

3) O papel do mediador

"A ABN - Formação e Consultoria Multidisciplinar, consultoria especializada em mediação de divórcios, define mediação como "Um método pelo qual uma terceira pessoa, neutra, especialmente formada, colabora com as pessoas que se encontram em situação de mudança ou mesmo de impasse, a fim de que restabeleçam a comunicação, podendo chegar a um acordo que as beneficie".

Segundo Dr. Grunspun, o mediador familiar é um profissional que auxilia casais em crise, agindo preventivamente, ou casais durante ou após uma separação, os quais buscam novas formas de família. Esta é uma profissão nova no Brasil, embora exista há tempos nos países mais avançados, onde o juiz, às vezes inclusive a pedido do casal, sugere um mediador para acompanhar o processo do divórcio. Não é o mesmo papel do advogado (embora este possa também se tornar um mediador, como um psicólogo ou outro profissional), pois o advogado cuida dos trâmites legais do divórcio, e não das questões pessoais e emocionais. Também não é o mesmo papel de um conciliador, diz Dr. Grunspun, pois na conciliação está implícito que o motivo das reuniões é para se chegar a um acordo em que o casal volte a viver junto."
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