Oct 15, 2005 09:43
19 yrs ago
3 viewers *
French term
affiner
French to English
Medical
Medical: Pharmaceuticals
Context is a natural slimming product. Its four main alleged effects all have to begin with the letter 'a' (due to the brand name). The first three are easy enough to find 'a' words for - accelerates, activates, accentuates is what I have so far - but the last one 'Affine la silhouette" seems more difficult to me. Any suggestions?
XXX se caract¨¦rise par 4 Actions principales, synergiques:
¡ñ Acc¨¦l¨¨re le d¨¦stockage des graisses
¡ñ Active la combustion des calories
¡ñ Augmente l¡¯¨¦limination des toxines
¡ñ Affine la silhouette
XXX se caract¨¦rise par 4 Actions principales, synergiques:
¡ñ Acc¨¦l¨¨re le d¨¦stockage des graisses
¡ñ Active la combustion des calories
¡ñ Augmente l¡¯¨¦limination des toxines
¡ñ Affine la silhouette
Proposed translations
(English)
| 3 +4 | change things? |
Bourth (X)
|
| 4 +1 | ameliorate |
Emma Grubb
|
| 5 | make more slender |
Diane de Cicco
|
| 4 -1 | attenuates |
Richard Hedger
|
| 3 | astonishing silhouette |
Georges Tocco
|
Proposed translations
+4
2 hrs
Selected
change things?
You might do better approaching this from another tack, i.e. abandon "silhouette", find a word beginning with A, and choose a suitable object.
- alleviates weight problems (much the same as "accélère le déstockage ..." admittedly, but who will notice?)
- amends your silhouette (a bit weak)
- alienates fat
- advances attractive lines (weak)
- acts to give you shapely lines (weak)
- abounds in goodness!
- abolishes cellulite
- attacks fat cells
- atomizes flabby flesh
That sort of thing. And then explain why to the client.
- alleviates weight problems (much the same as "accélère le déstockage ..." admittedly, but who will notice?)
- amends your silhouette (a bit weak)
- alienates fat
- advances attractive lines (weak)
- acts to give you shapely lines (weak)
- abounds in goodness!
- abolishes cellulite
- attacks fat cells
- atomizes flabby flesh
That sort of thing. And then explain why to the client.
Peer comment(s):
| agree |
Sylvia Smith
: Whoops - missed that bit. But what would be the problem? Isn't a good translation more important than a silly product name?!? :)
10 mins
|
|
But that would mean changing the product name to one beginning with R ...
|
|
| agree |
Shog Imas
: alleviates weight problems
1 hr
|
| agree |
Rachel Fell
: good idea
7 hrs
|
| agree |
Gillian Hargreaves (X)
1 day 19 hrs
|
4 KudoZ points awarded for this answer.
Comment: "Have gone with 'amends the figure' for now. The four effects are discussed individually later in the text, so I have to stick closely to the meaning, otherwise I would probably have opted for one of the less literal but more snappy suggestions. Many thanks to everyone who answered or commented."
-1
19 mins
attenuates
In my Robert & Collins attenuate = affiner
Does it sound right, that's another question!
Does it sound right, that's another question!
+1
1 hr
Emma Grubb
United Kingdom
United Kingdom
Native in English
Specializes in field
United Kingdom
Your patent translation partner
Native in: English 
Works in: German to English, French to English, Italian to English
ameliorate
Another option.
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at -38 min (2005-10-15 07:05:27 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Definition according to www.wordsmyth.net is "to make better, improve", synonym of improve/enhance
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at -38 min (2005-10-15 07:05:27 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
Definition according to www.wordsmyth.net is "to make better, improve", synonym of improve/enhance
6 hrs
Georges Tocco
Italy
Italy
Native in French
&
English
Specializes in field
Italy
French PhD, Harvard Med Sch Faculty
Native in: French , English 
, Italian
Works in: English to French, French to English, Italian to French, and 1 more.
Related KudoZ points
:
4
astonishing silhouette
just another one
1 hr
Diane de Cicco
France
France
Native in French
&
English
Specializes in field
France
Specialty: Biology, Chemistry, Medicine
Native in: English , French
Works in: English to French, French to English
Related KudoZ points
:
70
make more slender
it is a way of saying you're going to get slimmer without running into legal problems about having said something that isn't necessarily true
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 1 hr 35 mins (2005-10-15 11:18:13 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
affine la silhouette = makes you look more slender
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 1 hr 35 mins (2005-10-15 11:18:34 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
or something to that effect
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 7 hrs 50 mins (2005-10-15 17:33:43 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
How about "affords a finer silhouette"
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 1 hr 35 mins (2005-10-15 11:18:13 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
affine la silhouette = makes you look more slender
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 1 hr 35 mins (2005-10-15 11:18:34 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
or something to that effect
--------------------------------------------------
Note added at 7 hrs 50 mins (2005-10-15 17:33:43 GMT)
--------------------------------------------------
How about "affords a finer silhouette"
Peer comment(s):
| neutral |
Rachel Fell
: yes, but he needs it to start with the letter "A" - see above :)
28 mins
|
Discussion
XXX se caract��rise par 4 Actions principales, synergiques:
�� Acc��l��re le d��stockage des graisses
�� Active la combustion des calories
�� Augmente l����limination des toxines
�� Affine la silhouette